Catch-Ups

Proper Catch-Up Questions 

Whether you’re heading off on an adventure with a friend, or you’re journeying home with family, a train journey is the perfect opportunity for a proper catch-up  

Our Catch-Up Questions, developed with relationship psychologist, Dr Madeleine Mason Roantree, are designed to help conversations go beyond day-to-day updates and small talk. From reflecting on memorable moments to sharing hopes for the future, they can encourage more meaningful conversations and deeper connections.  So, next time you’re travelling together, make the most of your uninterrupted time on the train and try a few of the questions below. 

Easy Starters  

1. What’s a small thing you’ve started doing lately that instantly improves your day? 

2. What’s changed most in your life since we last caught up? 

3. What’s something you’ve recently discovered? 

4. What’s a good piece of advice you’ve recently received? 

5. What song reflects your current mood? 

Deeper Connections 

6. What is something you’re still figuring out about yourself?

7. What is something about your life now that would surprise your younger self or others?

8. What’s an experience that changed your outlook on life?

9. What’s a goal you’re working towards, and what’s the next step?

10. What do you hope people feel when they’re around you? 

Dr Madeleine’s top 10 tips for turning your train journey into a proper catch-up

1. Focus on your travel partner’s answer 

All too often, we may ask questions but we’re waiting for our turn to speak instead of really listening to the other persons answer, or what’s being said. 

2. Ask a follow-up question 

Give your travel partner extra time and space to speak, and allow them to elaborate on their answer; this enhances their experience of feeling heard. Use words like when, what, why, and how to help them expand on their answers and share more about themselves. You never know what you might find out when people are given the space to expand on their thoughts. 

3. Don’t interrupt with your own opinions or thoughts 

Wait until your travel partner has finished speaking. This is about them, so patience is key (you’ll get your turn to respond!) 

4. Allow for silences 

It may feel awkward, but try not to skip them. Silence can signal a quiet moment before something important is said. 

5. Look, nod, smile, and make small gestures or sounds while they speak 

These signals show that you’re paying attention to what they’re saying, and can provide reassurance to your travel partner, that it is OK to open up. 

6. Dare to be vulnerable 

Go beyond surface level small talk in your answers. Allowing for some vulnerability can really help open up a feeling of connection, for example, sharing how you feel about something. Just don’t overshare; keep it to an appropriate amount. 

7. Don’t assume you know what the other person is thinking 

We can’t be certain about what people think, because situations change, minds change, and so do memories. Keep a curious and open-mind, and you are likely to be surprised! 

8. Remember a deep and meaningful conversation can happen in under 20 minutes 

Don’t be held back by the idea that a heart to heart has to take a long time – a short train journey will do. If you focus on the connection and really listening to what’s being said, you will both benefit from the conversation. 

9. Acknowledge your travel partner’s answer with a brief comment 

Once someone has answered, add a short response to show you’ve heard them, for example, “That sounds like an amazing journey. Thank you for sharing.” 

10. Put your screen away or on silent 

This helps you both avoid being disturbed or distracted during the conversation. Enjoy the quality time.